A happy family in Incheon, South Korea. My birth father working as an engineer, my birth mother a stay at home mom, my two birth sisters ages 6 and 4, and my birth mother pregnant with me. In May 1987, my birth father was killed in a car crash. My birth mother had an emotional breakdown and gave birth to me prematurely. Not knowing how she would support her family, she placed me for adoption with hopes of a better life for me.
Meanwhile, a family in Michigan had been praying for a baby girl to complete their family. They were told that since they already had two girls they would have to adopt a boy. One day they got a call that a baby girl was available and would they like to adopt her? In April 1988, I came to America and became part of my family at 8 months old.
I was blessed to have the names of my birth parents, their birth dates, death date, their heights and weights, and the general situation surrounding my adoption. I grew up knowing what a sacrifice it must have been for my birth mother to part with her new baby. I understand that sacrifice more now that I have children. I don't know if I could have been selfless enough to place my babies for adoption if I were in the same situation.
The first picture I received of my birth mother.
When I was 20 years old I received a letter from my birth mother. She wrote it to my parents, but as I was a legal adult the adoption agency sent it to me. In this letter we learned that I had been born premature and this caused my birth mother to constantly worry about my health. She and I wrote a few letters since then. Here are a few excerpts from the letters to show you her heart. My Korean name is Eun Jin Lee.
First letter to my parents: "I have never forgotten Eun Jin even a day for the 20 years, but I couldn't meet her so that I would pray for her and cry."
Second letter after my response: "My loving Eun Jin! I feel thankful that God gave you a good husband. I wish that both of you will be forever happy with constant love and your home will be filled with love and sound health like heaven until the end of this world."
Third letter: "Life doesn't always have happiness, and even though you face some hardships and troubles in your life, I hope that you can overcome it wisely with your husband."
"My poor baby! I'm a guilty person. I have been crying for 20 years but now, I'm shedding tears of happiness after finding you out and looking at you healthy and beautiful. You gave me a peace and smile. I'm so grateful to God. Also thankful for your parents, family and your husband, Matthew. Eun Jin, thank you and I'm sorry to you."
This is my birth mother in 2008.
Even though I asked in each of my letters, she never mentioned my birth sister who was 4 years older than me. I am guessing that she either has passed away or was also placed for adoption. My oldest sister had been delayed in finishing college as they were not wealthy and could not afford it. They had a fire that destroyed all their belongings so she didn't have many pictures to send me and no pictures of my birth father.
In each letter she would lament having to be apart from me my whole life and say she would cry every day. She became a Christian during those years and had been praying that I was a Christian too. We were both so happy to have found this out.
She wrote in her first letter that she and my birth sister have tried to live earnestly so I will not be ashamed of them if we should meet. I could never be ashamed of them! She gave me life and more than that, she gave me the opportunity to have a far more comfortable life than she has had. I am so privileged to have grown up here in America and in the family I have. I am eternally grateful to her for her sacrifice and the strong love she had and has for me.
For our wedding she sent us these rings. She has very little money but she chose to spend what she had on gold rings with diamonds in them. Always sacrificing for her children.
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