The Two Week Wait

One of my friends recently told me about a website that's devoted to women telling their stories, hopes, and dreams (and possible symptoms) of the long two week wait between ovulation and that positive test or your most unwelcome monthly friend. I don't remember the name of the website but that's it- not about the rest of your pregnancy or the first year of your child. A site devoted entirely to women who are all hopeful and all read more into their bodies than they should (frosted flakes sound so good right now! I'm going to have a bowl since I already have them in my cupboard... Yeah, you're hungry not having a preggo craving. This is my personal story so I am not mocking anyone other than myself) and all are waiting for their hopes to be crushed with their period (which is much more cruel when you have a reason to want it gone than any other time of life, in my opinion) or that positive test, finally! 

As I sat around the house during my two week wait I began to think how often I really could post on a page like that. I go to What To Expect and The Bump every so often (mainly because I already have accounts there from Jackson's pregnancy) and read the message boards for those trying to conceive or those post miscarriage. It is honestly so encouraging to hear the stories of women who are where I am or who have been where I am. It is nice to know that I am not alone, that this is normal, and that God has a plan. I don't often contribute to these boards because I don't check often enough to know if someone responded, but I feel like if I had an outlet similar to twitter were I could just shoot off one liners regarding the wait, that could be helpful! 

What would I write? 

*pH stick had a darker line than before, but not as dark as the control- still ovulation time? 

*oh! What if we missed our chance for this month! Well, then we'd have an April baby I guess. 

*New baby's due date would be two days before Jackson's birthday! Neat... And stressful... 

*How long do sperm live inside you anyways? 

*Nausea? Oh my gosh! I must be pregnant! ... Or tired. It's 1 am, probably just tired... 

*Tender breasts... Or recovering from a bite from nursing child? 

*Nothing sounds good for dinner. Does that mean I have an aversion to all food? 

*I want brownies now! But it takes a half hour for them to bake! 

*I want to lose two pounds so my pregnancy weight can be calculated by this starting weight. Maybe the first tri will take care of that? 

*Google search on implantation bleeding...

**Seriously? 10 days early? 

Yup, that would've been my two-week-wait-twitter-feed. It is amusing (way after the fact) how much an individual can read into slight body twinges when she hopes to be pregnant. It is also interesting how much you forget about your first pregnancy for comparison! I remember finding out, I remember feeling sick at first, I remember feeling Jackson moving at 17 weeks, but other than that I don't remember all the small details. So thankful I journal so I can go back and read and remember. 

So, my fellow mother-to-be, take heart! You are not the only one who waits and waits and makes up cravings in your head and doesn't believe the negative pregnancy tests when you take them too early (or even right on time). There are many sisters who are right there beside you. I won't tell you what to do or not to do since everyone is different and handles the disappointment of not being pregnant each month differently, but one piece of advice I will give because it applies to everybody and I need to listen to it especially: 

Do not grow bitter at others who are successful sooner than you (or even after if they have an easier time of the progress than you did) in becoming pregnant. Be joyful for new babies being brought into the world and pray that the parents will have all the love and patience needed for the lifetime ahead. Being bitter will only add to your sorrow and build walls between you and what could be your future parenting support group. 

I know it is difficult and I still struggle with bitterness towards certain mommies from my first pregnancy. It is a constant battle not to cringe each time someone announces a pregnancy on Facebook, especially if the baby was unplanned. But just focus on your own little family and always remember what Thumper taught us, "If you can't say something nice don't say anything at all." 

Good luck to you on your journey to grow your family. My thoughts and prayers are with you.